chained

It has been some time since I last posted anything.

This few days has been really hectic and exhausting for me. My stress don’t arise from school work, but instead, from my social life.

Recently I had a chat with this guy I just met in school, he is a really direct and blunt person, and directly to me, without any harmful intention I assume, he told me that I don’t look so pretty. I didn’t feel so hurt at first, but it really does hurt after things start to sink in. It made me realize too, how fragile and small my self-esteem and confidence are. Despite doing fairly average in other areas in life, I just cannot seem to find my self-esteem. I crush and break down so easily with simple words and actions from others.

All along, I do know that I have a low self-esteem and confidence but I have always been in denial, ignoring these issues. No matter how hard I try to run away from it, it seems to be able to get me every single time.

What should I do?

My friends are all facing their own issues and I don’t think they would have the time to listen to me. I guess I really need to break myself away from negative people and I really need some time by myself for now.

I want to free myself from this.

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